Friday, December 31, 2010

The answer isn't 42

Those who believe that the earth is "mostly harmless" may be quite offended by the title of this blog post. However, even they will agree, that 42 isn't the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything. Funny thing is, most don't even know what the ultimate question of life is.

Inevitably though, it crosses everyone's mind. Or rather, for the lack of a better description, engulfs the mind with an intensity that would make a raging wildfire green with jealousy. It, of-course being the question that shakes the very essence of existence of even the strongest people out there.

In the words of the inimitable Dr. Sheldon Cooper, Ph.D., the question can be phrased as "To what end?". Upon most of us though, as we tread wearily through the brobdingnagian monotony that is life, it slowly dawns as a realisation that we don't really know what we want from it.

Given that this question, at least for a lucky few amongst us, results in the forging of a path that they follow for the rest of their natural born life, we may safely assume that this, in fact, is the the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything.

For most of us though, this realisation transcends the feeling of falling down an endless pit, with the damn thing not even possessing the common courtesy of having a bottom (Remember, its not the fall that kills you, its the sudden stop at the bottom that does!). Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that the feeling of not knowing the answer makes one suicidal, its just that the metaphorical bottom to that pit might be a jolt enough to make one sit up, take stock of life, think, ponder, contemplate. In other words, the metaphorical bottom is the epiphany all of us are waiting to have.

Sadly, so far, any epiphany to the purpose of life has eluded me with the same gusto as the Road Runner evading Wile E Coyote.

Why then all of a sudden, in the dying hours of the year, am I rambling about my (so far) wasted life. I guess it is because despite trying to, I cannot answer the question "What do you do?" with "I'm living my dream", which undoubtedly is the best response that could ever be garnered for this question. Or maybe it is just because despite enough attempts to do otherwise, I am going to spend the new year's eve in the exact same manner I did last year; Asleep before the new year dawns (per IST).

Whatever the reason be, 2011 does not seem to be bringing any breakthroughs. So if any of you out there, who chance upon this rant, have but even a sliver of insight into how to figure out what I want, lemee know.

PS: The crux of the matter however is that even after going through whatever trials and trepidations that lie in the path of getting to know what I want, what I really want, or rather, what I need may be something else entirely. But that perhaps is a topic for another day.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

how do you know your life is wasted if you don't know the purpose yet? isn't the definition of waste contingent on the purpose you seek?

Psycho McCrazy said...

@Anon
(so far) wasted life. And I insist on the wasted part because if what I am doing was the purpose, I would per perhaps a tad less miserable!

Voice said...

I had a chance to read this blog. Unfortunately I don't have the slightest clue about what you want.

When you say about purpose of life, does it mean you are acknowledging the existence of higher being because without his existence our life is just outcome of some chemical reactions.

Psycho McCrazy said...

@bhav
Chemical reactions or hand of god, we are meant for something, maybe not in the "saviour of the world" sense, but at least in the "life's been awesome" sense. And that is what I seek.

sonik said...

What can I say? We've already pondered over it for long and unsuccessfully.

Anonymous said...

throw a dart. flip a coin. there is no answer there is no end, it's all upside down and inside out. The further you go, you either run your self crazy or drive yourself sane...just another way of coping with the crazy. one's denial, the other is within the forever expanding scope of our minds. reality is an interpretation. consciousness has evolved throughout time, evolve yours your way. reason and purpose cannot be taught, they have to be wrought from the ideas that you, yourself have been seeking out and creating. every answer is merely another question phrase backwards. 42?

live it up.

Anonymous said...

thanks for this nice post 111213

Anonymous said...

thanks for this tips

C-127 said...

Good post. I'm more than a year late, but I'm glad that you started writing again.

I don't know whether this "haze-phase" has swept over within you. It's probably just relegated to a corner of your mind, otherwise you won't be able to function in this world! Anyway, here's my 2 paise.

I think its a healthy thing to ask such questions. Constant revaluation of yourself and your environment is the only way to improvement. As you can easily surmise I don't have any answers for you. Nobody will, except you perhaps. I just have one comment:
"Living a dream" is not the best one can say. People's dreams often infringe on other's well-being and cause harm too often. Besides, its just a matter of time before you "wake up" and see the futility of it all. Living in "reality", and remain unaffected by its waves of turbulence and yet be at peace, for me, would be a much better state of mind. :)

Good luck in your quest bro!